This is why I love having a nine-year-old son.
Mom: "Jasper, will you please pause the TV?"
Mom: "Because! I am making a phone call. Why do you have toe nails??"
Jasper: "You're crazy."
Once again, here I am laughing so hard I can hardly type. Why is that funny, you ask? (I know, that's what my husband is asking, too.) I have always gotten a kick out of saying nonsensical things to my kids and seeing them look at me like, "What is that supposed to mean?? Moms are supposed to make sense!" What's fun is that Jasper is now so wise to me. He just thinks his mom is crazy, and is silly back. OH, it warms a mother's heart. Some parents hope their children grow strong bones--I just hope my children grow strong funny bones!
P.S. Remember when we used to TURN DOWN the TV? Now we just pause it.
I don't blog regularly and probably never will, because it would make me an emotional wreck. I mean, who does that? OK I know, a lot of people do. But they clearly aren't as fraught with issues as I am. I think it's a writer thing. First of all, who is my target audience? What is their motivation for reading my blog? How much of a NARCISSIST does it make me to think people would actually care about what I have to say EVERY SINGLE DAY? (Look small, Facebook and Twitter)
On top of that, what would I SAY every day?
The reason I'm writing this is because today I had a moment where I thought, "if I were a blogger, that's what I would write about today." I was walking into Paradise Cafe when this really cool-lookin' tough guy walked out with a very interested and attentive look on his face. Right behind him was his wife. She was saying very earnestly, "I mean, she washes her towels every day!" I always get suck a kick out of this! I call it the Marriage Minutia Phenomenon. You would never try to impress a really cool tough guy on a date by talking about your friends laundry (OK maybe you would, but only because you were so nervous you were uttering mind-numbing ramblings). This really cool tough guy would never feign interest in how often your friend washes her towels.
But then, once we're married, we feign interest in all sorts of things! We ramble on about mindless details all the time, and we're not even nervous.
(After marriage you have children, who ramble endlessly in your ear about their scabs so you can't concentrate while you're trying to blog. And that's why you don't blog.