Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Tell Your Husband You Weren't Wasting Time Reading a Blog--You Were Helping A Friend

Remember how I sometimes used to lament my insecurities about blogging? I wondered what the purpose was of it all, even as I continued to post? Well back then I was wondering what the purpose was for my readers, and worrying I was wasting their time. But recently I've realized what the benefit was for me.

We've had a really difficult few weeks, during which I found myself at one point in a small room with a doctor and social worker, there to discuss a child. They focused their attention on me for a moment, and observed that it seemed I was truly venting to absolutely no one about the emotional stress I was carrying. They were pretty adamant that I make this a higher priority in my life. I got thinking about my blog--what an outlet it used to be for me, and how much comfort I took from the support I got from my readers. I stopped blogging regularly for two reasons: the time it took, and the ever unsettling question of whether I was breaching my childrens' privacy. I didn't realize the benefit I'd be giving up.

So thank you!!, anyone who may still be out there, for reading, and supporting. I needed that.

20 comments:

it's just lisa said...

glad to hear you will be posting more :) best of luck in with all you are going through... being a mom in hard.

Sovic Clan said...

I would love to have you back on here:) Your words flow with so many emotions. They always leave me thinking. Sometimes I just blog a draft. I may post it, I may not. It's so refreshing to get it out in the open, even if I don't allow people to read it.

Sally said...

I'm still here, Emily, and I am sure all your other blog followers are too. Vent away. It is really hard to deal with emotional stress without relieving some of the burden by discussing it with at least one other person. I am sorry you are having such a difficult time.

I have missed your blogs. I can understand completely about lack of time and also your worry about protecting your children's privacy. Don't know what to say about that except possibly taking down the photos, lovely though they are to see, and/or giving the children fictitious names for blogging purposes .....? But as my son says, so many people, particulary the young, live out their lives on Facebook these days, very much in the public domain with photos, personal details etc, that nothing much remains private. Tough decision!

BTW, if my Husband Told me I was Wasting Time by Reading a Blog, he would be cooking his own supper for a week ......

Kristin said...

Sorry you've had a rough time Em. Blogging is VERY therapeutic, but if you're worried about privacy, just go private. I kept all my faithful readers, aka, support system, but no longer have to worry about posting naked baby pictures. As for bad mouthing my kids, I think my readers realize it's mostly ME ranting, and not my poor children's fault what their crazy mother says on her blog...My blog has been my therapist over the years, and it is a great way to keep those who love you in the loop where they can offer support and love.

Good luck with everything!

Charlotte said...

Glad I can help!!

We just moved to 250 N--closer to you!

Charlotte said...

We love you Emily! Let us bear some of those burdens.

Leslie said...

Love tuning in Emily and learning from your experiences and perspective. We all learn from each other, and sometimes it helps to remember we're not alone the in the struggle called motherhood. Hope things improve, both for you and the children. What you're doing is tough, give yourself some credit and a break now and then. BTW, I referred someone from work to your blog. She and her husband are working on adopting two children from Ethiopia. She may call someday, her name is Denise.

Leslie said...

Love tuning in Emily and learning from your experiences and perspective. We all learn from each other, and sometimes it helps to remember we're not alone the in the struggle called motherhood. Hope things improve, both for you and the children. What you're doing is tough, give yourself some credit and a break now and then. BTW, I referred someone from work to your blog. She and her husband are working on adopting two children from Ethiopia. She may call someday, her name is Denise.

amydear said...

You've taken on so much in the last year or so, I can't even imagine how busy you must be. I always enjoy reading what you write. Hope you make some time to do it! I love blogs much more than FB or Twitter.

Jennifer Bruner said...

I think....as I see 8 comments already... that we all love and enjoy reading your posts! I hate to admit, I have checked for weeks, and was excited to see a new blog post. I am sorry that you are having an especially hard time right now. You are doing a fantastic job in my eyes, and I obviously am not up to your level as a mother in sooo many ways ;) But, I read your blog for inspiration and to get a glimpse of your blessed life! Thanks for sharing, we are here.

mabeybowman said...

Here! And listening...(or reading. Whichever. Both!) Feeling LOVE for Emily S.

Emily said...

I think as you blog you discover what blogging does for you... or for others, but it's the exchange we need in this hairy world where we don't sit on each other's porches sipping lemonade anymore.

Which, I wouldn't mind actually. Let's sip lemonade sometime. :)

jayna said...

still here and reading. i remember you mentioning your thoughts on blogging a couple of years ago... and i hafta (yes, i just spelled it like that) say... when i blog, it aint for them (them being anyone out there). blogging is for me. ;)

many hugs,
j

Lisa said...

From the time you were 3 years old, I thought you were one of the most incredible people I had ever met....keep on bloggin' baby!

Percy2626 said...

I have LOVED your blog for some time now. I believe about a year and a half. I stumbled across it through another blog I read as well. Right about the time you were in Ethiopia. After reading the newest post that day I went back and read them all! Your blog is wonderful therapy for anyone who is in the adoption world in any way. Thanks so much for all your words. Best of luck during your trying times. Hang in there. Thinking of you from afar. Pamela

Jamie said...

I have always LOVED your writing Emily...i too have struggled with my motivation for blogging but have found the benefits to me to be very worthwhile. I LOVE reading back on what I have written and just remembering. I LOVE everything that you write.

Brooke said...

I'm with Emily, let's sip lemonaid when I get to town. I would love to see you as much or as little time as you have. We love and support you from afar and hope that you don't feel alone in this crazy world of Motherhood, however you came about it(naturally, adoptive, medically helped). No matter the path it's all hard and it all seems thankless so much of the time. And let's face it, Men though they try just can't do all that a mom has to/will do for the kiddies. It's truely exhausting. Hmmmm, maybe I need to blog more from reading this comment, it would seem that I have a few grips of my own...

Anonymous said...

I love reading your vents. Please continue.

Corinne said...

So, I just need to add my own comment that I REALLY ENJOYED reading your posts. Not only are you an excellent and thoughtful writer but your experiences felt so relevant to my own parenting struggles - different, but still so relevant. Thanks for all you've been willing to share.

emily said...

i still regularly check your blog for updates even during dry spells. you gotta use the resources that are available to you and if blogging does the trick use it. your kids will forgiive you later and they will probably appreciate having a life journal to look back on. (just leave out the jr. high crush and first kiss details).